Josh Saunders

G: What would you do if you had proper abs?
G: I'm talking abs you can chip ice on
D: I'd go find all the boys who looked down their noses at me and I'd say "look at my abs!"
D: "Look at my beautiful goddam ABS!!!!!!!!!!!"
D: And then I'd run away
G: Yeah, you'd be a real bitch with abs

Winter

D: You know, somewhere in the world it's time to go to the beach...
G: That's almost poetic
G: Almost

Atkins

D: These boys look kind of hungry
G: Hungry for some lovin'?
D: No, hungry for some carbohydrates

Weekend

D: What did you do this weekend?
G: The usual
G: Cute boyz and cheap champagne
D: You sat at home and watched Police Academy in your PJ's again huh?
G: I had to wear shorts because by PJ's were in the wash

Lie Down With Me

D: Four more reasons to get horizontal

Actor Crush

G: So what - you're cheating on me??
G: WHO IS THIS RIVER???
D: Keep your jockstrap on
D: She's a friend ok
G: A friend! A friend!?
D: I just needed... another outlet
G: Oh I see, I'm not enough for you huh?
D: You're plenty enough
D: River's a huge fan of yours btw
G: She has her head screwed on right at least
G: Why didn't you tell me?
D: You were all busy with that Argentinian
D: I had some time on my hands
D: And Actor Crush was born
G: Well alright then
G: As long as I'm still the funny one

Your Guy Doesn't Cut the Mustard

D: Man, you have some weird ideas about cute guys Gabe
D: Here's a little something something
D: I like to call "Couch Candy"
D: (via All American Guys)

Get Down

G: Woo - it's Friday!
G: Get down with your wild self!

Jacob

G: Back by popular demand, here's Jacob!
D: Jacob is a great name
G: If you look carefully you can even see Jacob's coconuts...

Pornier

G: Is it getting pornier around here?
D: The nights are getting longer and colder ok...

Davor

G: J'adore Davor
D: Ou mon parapluie est ?
G: You've lost me
D: It's not the first time and it won't be the last

Socks

G: I don't know what's going on here
G: But I like it
D: Maybe it's some complicated dare?

Tongue

G: Hi
D: Hi
G: Good weekend?
D: It was okay. How was yours?
G: Pretty good
D: How was your date?
G: Yeah, it was fine
G: He's a bad kisser though
D: Really?
G: What's left of my tongue is in the freezer waiting to be surgically reattached
D: No ones perfect I guess

Online

G: Damien hasn't been online all weekend
G: Hope he hasn't fallen over in his Mother's high heels again...

Leandro Becker

G: I (heart) Leandro Becker

Naked Men

G: You know, when life gets complicated
G: Naked men always cheer me up
G: Here's to you naked men!

Toga

G: Hey
D: Oh hi
G: Hi
D: What?
G: What do you mean what?
D: Exactly
G: Are you being weird??
D: Maybe, maybe not
G: Um, ok
D: I know you are but what am I?

Slaving

D: Gabe must still be on his date
D: And here I am slaving over a hot blog
D: You just can't find good help these days

Carpet

G: I like that carpet he's sitting on
D: I totally know the gay man you're going to become one day
G: What, a gay man who likes carpet??
D: No, a gay man with a Beagle named Morris and a collection of antique plates